Post Archive
She was like me – Always putting on a face to fit each occasion or person she was speaking to at the time. There was one for school drop off and pick up. One for Monday’s client, one for Friday’s client. Occasionally she’d put one on for her husband. One for the person she walked…
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The whole COVID-19 isolation Experience for me was a bit different, I found that I couldn’t spend as much time Going out like I usually do. Before COVID-19 I was able to catch up with all my friends, We were able to go out to the pubs, Fringe clubs And also to theatre…
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The first thing I learned from chronic pain is that hope is dangerous. It took the first couple of years of regular punishment and debilitating pain to realise that if I allowed myself to hope, I would convince myself I could pretend to be normal. And if I did something normal… ate something normal, walked…
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I feel like I am made of glass and things that shatter. Maybe not glass. Sugar glass. The kind that they use on television that shatters but that does not pierce. I know that I am okay and that my anxieties are not real. I know that is unlikely to be real. I know that…
Read More “Did you know that my grandparents build this house with their bare hands?” I hear myself say, a distinct note of pride inflecting my voice. I’m flicking through photos, pointing out the octagonal shape and unique fixtures. There’s pride, yes, and a sense of novelty. There’s a quaintness to the anachronism of building four walls…
Read More Kanye West called his Bipolar disorder his ‘superpower’ and whilst that sounds empowering, I wouldn’t call my anxiety disorder a superpower. I mean, even if I was going to dress it up in a frock and smear make-up on, it’d be something grotesque barely contained in a stretched dress with unravelling threads and blotched make-up.…
Read More It was my third hospitalisation and my most difficult. My husband came to visit me with my three year old daughter who was sitting on his knee smiling. She had a beautiful smile, but when I looked at my husband, I had no memories of our twelve years together. I felt numb and when that…
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I was born to be somebody; we all are. And mostly I like that I’ve been different, a bit messier. I definitely didn’t waste my youth. I haven’t made monetary gains but it’s been rich with unique and daring experiences that’ll inform what I do in my 30s, 40s, 50s… and 60s if I get…
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Ever stood in front of the mirror and looked into your own eyes? I mean a deep look, not a cursory glance. What do you see? Years ago, I did this and I saw a young boy with blue eyes, blonde hair, full of innocence and vigour. Bursting of dreams and wild expectations. And I…
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CW: Sexual Assault I would like to deliberate regarding Gang Members (my dissociated parts) as it is almost an institution. Allow me to cope with the realisation of the devastation, through courage and strength of mind. Fear is a voice I often hear, year after year. Although it may appear, at times it seems…
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